It's like The Chase Never Happened

As expected, the Second Doctor is written like the First, e.g. - "That ship, my children..." The Tardis lands on a big metal ball which is in the middle of snagging the Marie Celeste from the ocean with a tractor beam. Stepping out to give things a look-see, Jamie senses danger and suggests a retreat back to the ship which prompts Zoe to reprimand him, "Oh, shut up. This is only a spaceship. They're quite common where I come from."

Odds are the writer had no idea where Zoe came from. What horrible dialogue. I don't think Zoe was ever this cantankerous on TV. Then again, I do have one more TV story to go.

Both the TARDIS and Marie Celeste crews are brought inside the globe which is operated by a couple of Arcturans named Eretz and Lantis who, we are told, look "like magnificent specimens of early Greek manhood." Not sure quite what that means...Anyway, they do not breath oxygen but rather ammonia and methane. The globe is like their version of the H.M.S Beagle as they're out roaming the galaxy to investigate other species, though luckily they are eschewing the whole anal probing thing.

The two ersatz Darwins are in an enclosed observation area but Jamie and the Doctor shatter the windows with some marlin spikes which I learned are used to make knots, something sailors do a lot of. This breach means that our heroes' captors have a little trouble breathing. Their respiratory problems lead to the ship going out of control and falling into the sea. But it also presents an opportunity for escape.

The skipper of the Marie Celeste asks the Doctor how to escape the metal ball and he selfishly replies, "I'm not concerned about getting out of the iron ball. All I'm concerned about is getting inside this ship of mine here." 

Unfortunately, the Doctor can't find the TARDIS key and he goes from being pissy to sounding like a pitiful teenager as he moans, "How stupid I am, my friends. How you must despise me."

I rolled my eyes here, I can tell you.

The dreaded Kraken attacks the ship and the Doctor recalls that he had left the key in the TARDIS door lock. He, Jamie, and Zoe scramble to their ship but the crew of the Marie Celeste now regard them as warlocks or madmen and refuse to board the TARDIS. And so our heroes merely look on as the sailors die in agony as ammonia and/or methane overtakes them.

After watching the sailors suffocate to death, the Doctor becomes rather cheerful and says he is happy to have solved the mystery of the Marie Celeste.

Uff da! This one was just bad. Making Troughton into Hartnell was especially annoying here for me but I don't know why. Maybe it's because the Hartnell imitation was so lame.