New Latin Textbook Changes With Times

By JUSTIN POPE, AP Education Writer

"Optimus magister bonus liber," goes the old Latin adage: "The best teacher is a good book." For generations of modern-day Latin students, that book has been "Wheelock's Latin." But as the latest generation of students buy their Wheelocks in the coming weeks, they will discover a textbook that looks very different from the original, densely packed tome Professor Frederic Wheelock sketched out a half-century ago.

There are photographs, maps and eye-pleasing layouts. Exercises reflect the latest pedagogical theory. Readings feature fewer battlefield dispatches and more emphasis on women and everyday life. There is even a dirty poem by Catullus.

Wheelock's also has a Web site, e-mail discussion groups and, soon, online audio recordings.

"The times, they are a-changing," says Richard LaFleur, the University of Georgia classicist who took over the editorship of the series in the mid-1990s following Wheelock's 1987 death. "We want to keep up with the changes."

Latin, however, hasn't changed for 2,000 years. And where publishers see essential updates, critics of high textbook prices often wonder if new editions aren't just a ploy to raise prices.

Critics say they understand why biology and accounting textbooks need frequent updating, by why algebra or ancient languages?

Unnecessary updates are "one of the biggest driving factors behind the high costs of textbooks," says Merriah Fairchild, higher education advocate at the California Public Interest Research Group.

LaFleur says that many textbooks are updated too frequently, but that even Latin needs a fresh coat of paint sometimes. He and Wheelock's family say they have put out a new version about every five years, and pressed Harper Collins to keep the series affordable.

Textbook prices are a hot topic on college campuses and have prompted hearings on Capitol Hill. In January, a CALPIRG report found University of California students could expect to pay $898 per year for textbooks, up from $642 in 1996-97. The average price per new textbook was over $100. Three-quarters of faculty members surveyed believed new editions were usually unnecessary.

Publishers blame an unusual marketplace where they have just one year to earn back their investment; after that, students buy used copies and the publishers get nothing. That encourages frequent new editions.

"The basic business model is broken," says Al Greco, a Fordham University professor who follows the industry at the Book Industry Study Group. Greco doesn't believe publishers are price-gouging. Still, he concedes: "You could question whether there's a need to revise the calculus book, the U.S. history book, the Latin book every three years."

Yet revise they do. Even the death of an author may not derail a series. Anthony F. Janson took over the "History of Art" series after his father died in 1982. (The revised sixth edition, featuring more emphasis on religious art in the late Renaissance, was retailing for $95 this week in a downtown Boston bookstore). A rival, "Art Through the Ages" still carries author Helen Gardner's name on its 11th edition, 60 years after her death, and was retailing for $108.95, with CD-ROM, on Amazon.com.

But while art books require expensive-to-print, color images, critics say that isn't true for other subjects. Calpirg has criticized frequent updates in calculus, a subject little-changed since Gottfried Wilhelm Leibniz and Sir Isaac Newton invented it in the 17th century.

In Wheelock's case, Harper Collins bought the title after the namesake's death and put out a fourth edition based on notes he left. LaFleur got involved by pointing out errors in that edition. Eventually, he and the family discussed his taking over the project.

"He had the right feeling about my father, the respect, the allegiance to my father that was music to our ears," daughter Deborah Wheelock Taylor says.

LaFleur and the family insist the textbook has always been a labor of love, and affordability a priority. New versions contain pictures, but they are black-and-white. Harper Collins essentially publishes Wheelock's as a trade book, which means cheaper paper. Wheelock's has a Web site but is not bundled with expensive CD-ROMs.

"It's not bells and whistles," says Greg Chaput of publisher Harper Collins. "It's just solid, great information, beautifully written."

The basic, paperback version, the most popular introductory college Latin text, costs just $20.95. A supplementary reader is $19 and a workbook $17. Prices will probably rise a few dollars with a revised sixth edition due out next year, and a still-more-expensive hardcover is in the works, targeting high schools. But Harper Collins insists it will be reasonably priced.

Calpirg's Fairchild, though not familiar with the Wheelock's series, says Latin "sounds like a good example of a subject that doesn't need much updating." But she adds: "Any publisher who is consciously trying to keep the costs of production low so they can pass on the savings to students is doing the students a favor."

The book sells about 30,000 copies a year — a tiny market compared with subjects such as economics or Spanish, which are taken by millions of students.

"It's a small fraction of my income," says LaFleur, who fell in love with Roman culture watching "Ben Hur" as a boy and drops words like "errata" into everyday conversation. "We're not in it for the sales. If people wanted to make money, they wouldn't plan on becoming Latin teachers."

Birthday

Work sucks and next week the position ends. Been sending out resumes left & right. Went to an atheists meetup this evening. Some really nice folks. And a chickie even showed up! The Dulcinea continues to put out, which, as Martha would say, is a good thing. Old Man Standiford and I went to see Alien vs. Predator the other day. It was pretty bad.

I'd write more but I'm in kind of a strange mood. Today is my dad's birthday. While I had been planning to just put on some music and look at pictures, I just can't quite bring myself to do it.

Horses' Mouths

Today’s plan is to get through the last 3 or so hours of work and then get the hell outta Dodge. I’ve decided to use up all those half-full jars of curry paste in the refrigerator by making curried chicken tonight. Well, I’ll try to use them up, at any rate. After dinner, I shall have the company of The Dulcinea. We haven’t seen each other since the weekend and I don’t think either of us has had an orgasm since then so we’re both keen on rectifying this situation.

I feel like a complete dunce as I blew a nice opportunity last night to hit on a hottie. Short with long brown hair. We chatted briefly in the cereal aisle but I neglected to stick around long enough. Bummer. I was so thrown off that I bought the wrong kind of milk.

I think I must have a self-esteem problem as I am, in general, horrible at hitting on womyn. In addition, I was quite disturbed by my reactions to various ads as I perused some at a site the other day. I’d find a picture of a nice-looking woman and check out a larger version only to find that, much to my dismay, I felt most of the women were just too beautiful for me, that I wouldn’t stand a chance with them. I then proceeded to curse the site for not being able to filter by marital status. “Just gimme the divorcees,” I pleaded.

Sometimes I feel like I’m looking a gift horse in the mouth. I mean, I have a woman who makes booty call to me. And, assuming her parental duties don’t conflict, is always ready and willing when I beckon. We’ve been e-mailing one another today and I got this:
I will likely need a shower, because, as we know, I am a dirty, dirty girl. And having my back scrubbed sounds very good...

For anything I’ve wanted to do in bed, she’s been a willing partner in crime. (In fact, I think the next thing we’re going to try is photography.) But I keep fantasizing about someone else. Not usually someone in particular, just this anonymous woman with small breasts and long hair. And it’s driving me nuts. I’ve been hanging out at places and at times that I normally wouldn’t just to increase my odds of finding such a womyn. And, as I said above, I’ve been perusing personals. Unfortunately, they’re not particularly helpful. Most women my age seem to either have kids or want them and, since I find that to be an immediate turn-off, I just move on to the next ad.

Yesterday was not a particularly good day. I felt very angry, very disillusioned. I’d read way too much about the awful things going on in the world. It made me feel helpless and hopeless. And very, very alone. Things did get better when I got home and could spend some time, well, alone. Having no one around to make demands on me proved very salutary. Honestly, I really don’t want to see The Dulcinea tonight but I do want to get laid. She hangs around too long. After sex, she wants afterglow and I want to either read, watch a movie or just do something – anything except lying in bed. Well, unless it’s to go to sleep. I dunno – I guess I just like post-coital solitude. There are no emotional bonds that need tending between her and me. Not on my side, anyway. But I must admit that The Dulcinea seems resigned to my emotional distance. At least I think so – I dunno. How can I tell? She keeps lending me books and giving me little gifts yet she’s unobtrusive. She doesn’t call or email all the time, which is nice. I worry that she’s gonna break off our arrangement and then I’ll be like a junkie without a dealer.

Rant O'the Day

Last week I was listening to Air America, the new lefty radio network. A gentleman by the name of Mike Malloy came on. Apparently it was his first broadcast for AA but he had been on the radio elsewhere as many people called in to welcome him back to the airwaves. Amidst all the welcome backs and well wishes was a caller named Jeff who expressed his disillusionment with the Democratic Party and that John Kerry is essentially the same as George Bush. With vitriol usually reserved for Bush himself, Malloy went after the guy:

Jeff: I'm disillusioned.
Malloy: About what?
Jeff: The Democratic party.
Malloy: (Frustrated tone) Oh God. What about the Democratic party's got you disillusioned?
Jeff: Well, the fact that, ya know, if you look at the 2 party system, you've got Bush as the wolf, you've got Kerry who's the wolf in sheep's clothing.
Malloy: Yeah.
Jeff: That's the way it looks like to me.
Malloy: Yeah.
Jeff: I'm voting for Nader because he's the closest thing we've got to somebody who's honorable, is actually willing to make a stand on anything...
Malloy: Yeah.
Jeff: …without talking outta both sides of his mouth. And is actually concerned for the working class poor in this country.
Malloy: Yeah. OK.
…Malloy: I've been through this discussion a thousand times - I'm so sick of it I could just vomit blood. OK, is that graphic enough? Nader - I love Ralph Nader. He's a great man, he also…if he continues this nonsense, he's gonna hand this election to Bush. Now…in a perfect world, Nader would be the Democratic nominee, I grant you that. But this is not a perfect world, this is Bushworld, alright? If you want 4 more years of Bush, vote for Ralph, that's all I can say. You know that as well as I do. Every vote for Nader is a vote away from Kerry and a vote for Bush. For God's sake, the Republican Party is financing some of these get-out-the-vote campaigns for Nader so don't be a fool. It's OK to be idealistic but don't be a fool, OK?

This is a refrain I hear often from the far left. “Anybody but Bush” is the new motto. Michael Moore and Bill Maher got down on bended knees before Ralph Nader and pleaded with him to withdraw from the presidential race. While the scene was funny on one hand, it also symbolized the great extent to which progressives have given up the fight. Most of the Left views Ralph Nader as an enemy. Why? If I were to vote for Nader, it would go to his column, not Bush’s. Then again, with these new computerized voting machines, it wouldn’t be too surprising if that were to happen. Progressives love to contrast themselves against conservatives by saying such things as they stand for things like fairness and equality – genuinely good moral principles – whereas the Right stands for the interests of Big Business. Not to pick on Michael Moore, but here’s part of his speech from a Nader rally in the last presidential election:

If ya don't vote your conscience now, when will you start? When will you start to follow your conscience? If at the age of 18 or 19 or 20 years old, if at this very 1st election of your life you decide to settle for less, how has that moved us forward? We're at the place that we're at because we have settled for so less for so long - if we keep settling it's only gonna get worse. The lesser of 2 evils - you still end up with evil…we're being asked to choose the 2nd worst candidate…You know, this country never would have got to where it was if people had behaved that way. The Founding Mother and Founding Fathers of this country - what if they had said, "Oh, I'm afraid, I'm afraid of King George. You know, I…I…if we have a revolution we might have a worse king! So, uh, I…I guess we shouldn't have a revolution cuz we can't win, we can't win!"

"Ralph can't win. Ralph can't win. Ralph can't win." How many times have we heard this? What if Rosa Parks had said to herself, "I'm the only person on this bus - I can't win! I'm afraid." But that's not what she did. She took her seat on the bus! She acted some courage! She had the courage of her convictions! The only reason we have moved forward is because of people of courage! You don't make a decision based in fear, make your decision based on your hopes, your dreams, your aspirations, and your conscience. Not from fear!

Oh, how far the mighty have fallen! Moore now endorses Kerry though his sympathies still lie with Nader and/or the Green Party. Why? I’d do not hesitate to guess that he fears another 4 years of Bush. Not only Moore but much of the Left fears another 4 years of Bush. They are content to settle for the second worst candidate and let things get worse. The Left is fond of railing against businesses who seek short-term profit instead of long-term viability which, they argue, would be better for the people on the shop floor. To my mind, the credibility of many liberals is lost in their rush to abandon their consciences and take up the same tactics they’ve been denouncing for 20+ years. Moore asked the youth of America to cast a vote in favor of their hopes and aspirations. As his words make clear in his films, books, and speeches, Moore believes in the goodness of the American populace and he called for them to stand up to the affronts against it. He called on people to help make fundamental changes to the status quo, changes to core problems in our society. A few years later, Moore has retracted that call to service and, instead, rings a klaxon warning us of the evil that is George Bush. While I don’t know much about Malloy or his past views, here in 2004 he is content with being the obverse of Fox News pundits. And his cynicism is disturbing. After conceding that the Democratic Party is funded by big corporations, he ended the call above like this:

For Christ's sake! The funding for all campaigns in this county - for everybody - is all the same. Pick your poison.

After a commercial break, the next caller came on and wanted to return to the “Nader caller”, now a derogatory term. Malloy disallowed this and the caller was left to remark that the guy “needs to get off his high horse.” Doesn’t that sound familiar? If Rush Limbaugh were to do that, these same lefties would be falling all over themselves to use phrases like “limiting the debate”. Nowhere did Malloy actually address Jeff’s concerns - he did not want to talk about corporate power, for instance. Instead he dismissed it as a given. And he used the same tactics as does the Bush administration – fear. Doesn’t “A vote for Nader is a vote for Bush” sound a bit like Orwellian doublespeak? In other words, if you vote for a candidate that represents the concerns and values that we both share, you’re actually voting for the candidate that does not represent these things.

Remember: NADER DID NOT COST GORE THE 2000 ELECTION! Michael Moore knows this – he discusses it in Fahrenheit 9/11 and in Stupid White Men. And how does he know this? Go to any liberal/progressive web site that has recommended reading and you’ll find Greg Palast’s The Best Democracy Money Can Buy. The first chapter is about Palast’s investigations in the debacle in Florida back in 2000. It is from here that Moore drew his information. The Democratic Party demonized Nader after Bush was put into office and now the Left is demonizing him out of fear. Rather than view the record of the Bush administration as a call to arms, as a rallying point for strengthening efforts to enact change in our society, progressives have given up the fight. Instead of seeing the past few years under Bush as making the case that we need to elect Nader more than ever, they’ve internalized the “I can’t win” mantra. My worry is that most progressives see this whole situation as just a bump in the road and that the movement will just be able to pick up where it left off. That any momentum gained up to this point can simply be conjured at the drop of a hat once Kerry is in office. Progressives have spent years complaining about the lack of choices at the polls and trying to expand those choices. And now they are undoing all of that work. The lesson here for the Dems is that, if you are able to demonize the GOP enough, the far left will fall in line and you’ll get their votes. Progressives are throwing away all their hard work they’ve done in creating a viable 3rd party.

Let’s be fair. If you’re going to say that a vote for Nader is a vote for Bush, then also follow-up by admitting that a vote for Kerry is a vote for big corporations. As progressives prepare to go to the polls to cast a vote for John Kerry, they are also becoming chicken shits who are afraid to follow their consciences. They are doing the exact opposite of what Rosa Parks did. They are also becoming hypocrites in that they’ll continue to speak against the influence of corporate power from one side of their mouths and preach the virtue of Kerry from the other. “Anybody but Bush” may be catchy but it is virtually meaningless and enlightens no one. The Bush administration, when not lying outright, couches their words in vagueness and now the progressives are doing the same. “Anybody but Bush” does nothing except express contempt for an administration. It says nothing of where you stand on issues or lay out the course you’d like to see this country take in the future. Too many liberal voices sound disembodied from any firm positions or ideals other than their dislike of Bush. And after expressing their dislike, they follow it up with apologetics. They have to throw their support for Kerry out of fear of Bush and then temper it and distance themselves from Kerry for fear that they’ll lose their progressive credentials. For me, they’re already lost.

Day Off

I've decided to forego work today. I suppose I could have gone in but I have a job interview this morning and want to try to sneak a haircut in before it.

I had a phone interview yesterday while I was at work and the guy called my house asking to schedule a live one about 2 hours later. Apparently I made a good impression. I didn't think it went that well but, then again, I'm a horrible judge of such things. While the position isn't a dream job, by any means, it isn't a contractor position so I'd be a real employee with, theoretically, real benefits. And it's very close to home so my drive would be slashed 66%. I'd like to get health insurance again and, if I luck out, they'll have some kind of tuition reimbursement plan.

Today is Pete's birthday so my other 2 invites will just have to wait.
Holy biscuits! These tennis chickies are hot! I am really frisky right now. Woke up with morning wood and sex has been on my mind ever since. I think I'll do the interview, run an errand and then go ogle womyn somewhere.

Morning Musings

Aside from spending countless hours pondering politics, I’ve been doing other things. My relationship with The Dulcinea continues. She seems to have come to terms with the fact that I’m not interesting in a serious relationship and mostly interested in sex. It seems that the mechanism her brain has used is “if you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em”. Yesterday afternoon she called me and said that it was a booty call. Despite an urge to be alone and continue reading, I invited her over. Sex. I will yield to it every time. With her admission that is was merely a booty call, I expected her to leave shortly afterwards but noooo. I was keen on reading and doing chores but she lingered. She wouldn’t leave. I didn’t really mind too much if she hung around. But if I left her to her own devices, she’d probably get pissed that I was ignoring her. I felt like I was obligated to entertain her even though this meant not being able to do what I felt like doing. I’m happy to lie around holding her for 10 or 15 minutes after we have sex but there are times when I just want her gone. Leave me be. I am thankful for our flings – she indulges my every whim – but I’m on the lookout for someone younger, a nullipara. A nullipara with long hair.

I hate to sound like a total pig but I can’t help it. I spent a few seconds at a stop sign today watching a woman walking the other way. I have no feelings for The Dulcinea. I enjoy her company as well as the sex but I want more and something different.

This morning was pretty amusing. I stopped in at CZ ostensibly to get coffee but, in reality, it was to see Jolene and her long hair. We chatted for a while which meant I got a late start and didn’t make it to work on-time. No matter, though. The boss doesn’t get here until about 45 minutes after I do and I’m a lowly contractor who’s contract expires in a month. Besides, the employees here are always late. Obviously no one checks or cares.

During the drive, I listened to NPR. As I was sipping coffee, the announcer proclaimed that the CEO of the company I work at had resigned. Here’s a the story:

The CEO of the CUNA Mutual Group quit after allegedly offering cash to employees if they would break away from their union.

Mike Kitchen retired after the board of directors found out he had offered $1,000 to the group that wants to change the current union structure, News 3 reported.

CUNA and the union, representing 1,400 workers, have not reached agreement on a new contract, and the two sides recently agreed to a 30- day cooling-off period that temporarily halted union picketing.

Kitchen reportedly offered his own money to a group that wanted to set up their own representation. CUNA Mutual says the group declined the money.

The board of directors learned of the offer and after looking into it, asked Kitchen for his resignation.

Union officials said they are glad Kitchen resigned.

“Hopefully this removes a major impediment to the ongoing and lengthy, difficult negotiations Local 39 has been engaged in for the last many months,” Jim Cavanaugh of the South Central Federation of Labor told News 3.

Kitchen had been CUNA's CEO since 1995.

The company said Jeff Holley, its chief financial officer, will take over until a search is made to find Kitchen's replacement.

After hearing more news, I get to work and park my car. Walking to the entrance, I noticed a band of 3 gentlemen clad in green polo shirts approaching me. So, they had brought back the 21st century Pinkertons. These guys worked for a security firm who specialized in doing whatever it is they do during labor disputes. They hadn’t been around for nearly a month and now they once again patrol the parking lots. CEO resigns -- Pinkertons. Hmmm…any connection between the 2, ya spose?

I’ve been here an hour and am ready to go home. I’m proofreading Naomi Klein’s No Logo, a polemic against branding and its effect on popular culture. At least I think it is. I haven’t really read much of it. I’ve been removing the word “LIE” which an angry Usenet poster seems to have used to replace every instance of the words “the,” “of,” and “on”. Apparently the person is a right-winger who can’t stand anything in opposition to Faux News but also feels the need to post on Usenet. So he or she reached a compromise. Post but make sure you put the word “LIE” everywhere so everyone knows your feelings on the matter. Ah well, keeps me occupied.

I took a step towards publishing my first zine – I installed InDesign on my laptop. Now I just need some articles and pictures. What to put in there? I’ve got some stuff to contribute but I’d also like to write some new things. And I’d like to have other folks put in their $0.02 as well. Anyone interested in contributing?

Reading Too Much

I am currently watching an interview with Paul Krugman being streamed over the Internet while I sup coffee. The past several days have been a bit on the odd side. This is probably because I've been reading too much. And I've been reading lefty books, mostly. Most of my reading has been done at work. Things are usually fairly slow and, being a contractor, I'm not on any projects, have no meetings to go to, and whatnot. So, if the phone ain't ringin', I've got nuthin' to do. So I read. Today I finished reading Ron Suskind's The Price of Loyalty. It's about former Treasury Secretary Paul O'Neill who was fired by George Bush about 2 years ago. Bush comes across as being a rather ineffectual leader - a puppet - surrounded by hard-nosed puppeteers who were keen on pushing through their ideological agendas without any discussion. People like Karl Rove and Dick Cheney who have seemingly made it their life's missions to undo FDR's web of social nets, annex Iraq, and privatize & deregulate everything to line the pockets of their fatcat friends as well as their own.

O'Neill is the former CEO of Alcoa and a very wealthy man. Nevertheless, the book portrays him as a man who went to Washington to do good. His method was to gather data - hard facts - and get together with people from all sides to hash it out and come up with the best, if not the right, answer. But Bush and his most powerful cronies would have none of this. O'Neill sought to assemble communities of inquiry to find the right answer while his opponents in the administration came into power with an agenda and wouldn't let such minor things as fiscal responsibility get in the way of lining the pockets of Enron and Haliburton.

Interestingly, the book puts Alan Greenspan in a whole new light. He and O'Neill have been friends for decades and the two conspired to push sound economic policy through the Bush administration and into practice. Unfortunately, their plan went awry. Before I read the book, I knew Greenspan as the guy who goes before Senate committees and give exceedingly opaque treatises on the state of the economy. That and he was friends with Ayn Rand. But The Price of Loyalty portrays him as someone at odds with the Bush administration and a man with sound values and firm grasp on common sense. Although perhaps it shouldn't have, that seemed revelatory.

Reading all of these lefty tomes has made me feel like I've fallen into Orwell's 1984. From what I recall from 20 years ago, any analogy of the US to Oceania seemed to relate to technological advances, how stealthily and easily we the people could be spied upon. But now I've come to terms with the fact that James Bond-like spying devices are a reality. What really concerns me is that doublespeak has become the MO of the Bush regime and no one seems to care. Honestly people, there was a legitimate reason your high school English teacher made you read 1984 - it wasn't just to piss you off or keep you busy. Bush runs up a deficit of several hundred billion dollars just like Reagan yet there are still folks who view the Republicans as fiscal conservatives and Democrats as the tax & spenders. These people take their tax cut to the bank, watch the deficit balloon, and call Bush fiscally responsible. "Those damn Democrats will raise taxes and spend it all!" Just like that nasty Democrat Bill Clinton who actually balanced the budget unlike his 2 Republican predecessors and his Republican successor. Wasn't it Jerry Browne who, during the Democratic primaries in 1984, said that we're gonna have to bite the bullet and raise taxes?

We need some new rules to move this country towards a sense of Rawlsian fairness. To wit:

1) progressive taxation - Adam Smith was in favor of them. The more wealth you have, the more you use government services and protections. YO! Rich people ! YOU pay for them.

2) Pick one of the following:

a) the United States makes a serious effort to wean itself off of fossil fuels OR

b) the owners of or children of owners of SUVs that never take their gas-guzzlers offroad are the first to go off to war.

3) The Fairness Doctrine is to be reinstated. A lefty figure gets to have equal time on Fox News and the like to give an opposing view to shatknockers like Bill O'Reilly and his ilk.

4) Corporate CEOs will be held legally responsible for the crimes their company's commit.

5) Corporate CEOs cannot complain about government interference & regulation, watch the company go under, and then ask for a bailout by the Feds. If you're going to tout the virtues of the free market free of government intervention and then downsize, move jobs abroad, bust unions, get outrageous compensation packages, etc., then you have no right to crawl to Uncle Sam and the taxpayers and ask them to get you out of your mess.

Shit, there's probably many more rules but I'll stop here. November 2nd will be a nail-biter for me.

Contrasting

Distraction. Pure and simple. I really do have a lot that I'd like to write about but I never seem to get into the writing mood for some reason.

Work is boring. I'm sitting here and that is first & foremost on my mind. The job is easy and not particularly busy. But I'll be reading and getting really into it when the phone rings. On top of it all, this is the worst hell desk I've ever worked on. I mean, they give you just a smitten of training and a pittance of resources with which to do your job. I have to put people on hold constantly so I can get up and wander around trying to find someone who's been here longer than I who isn't already on a call.

On the bright side, my contract here is only for another month so the insanity may not last much longer. Also of good tidings, Gina forwarded my resume upwards and onwards at her second place of employment. I think the job title is Systems Support Specialist. With a title like that, you know it's nothing spectacular but it could be a gig where I am not tied to the phone. Plus I have no future here - I am just here in case of a strike or lock-out. I am a measley contractor. It would be nice to actually be hired by someone so I'd have benefits again and whatnot. I was going to bring in Sunday's classifieds but completely spaced on it. But there's always plenty of online job boards to peruse.

Since it's been so slow here, I've been emailing myself e-books to read. And to proofread. OCR technology ain't perfect, ya know. The past week or so I've read Dude, Where's My Country? & Downsize This! by Michael Moore and Bill Maher's When You Ride Alone. Now I'm in the middle of Greg Palast's The Best Democracy Money Can Buy. Palast is a reporter best known for his expose on the Florida election scandal in 2000 and that's what this book is about. He's the main source for Moore's rants in print and on celluoid about Bush being an illegitimate president. Reading such stuff is simultaneously depressing and angering. Corruption, lying, greed, and lots of little people getting fucked over royally. On top of this, I've been listening to the audio book of Ron Suskind's The Price of Loyalty when I got to bed. Such things don't really put me in a mood to deal with corporate bullshit.

I turned 32 on Tuesday. Not particularly different than 31, truth be told. After I got home, I started troubleshooting the home computer of some manager here who enlisted my services. Then The Dulcinea came over after dusk. And she came bearing gifts. Got some chocolate, a bunch of condoms, a condom in chocolate, and a toy. To top things off, I got blowjob while the toy was used on me. So, all in all, an extremely nice set of gifts. As I laid there relaxing, I began to fall asleep. But The Dulcinea would have none of it. She began fiddling with my naughty bits and got only minimal response. Then she pulled out the lube and got the reaction she sought. One second she is lying next to me with a hand between my legs and the next she is on top of me putting my member inside her. My brain came to its senses and I got into the swing of things.

This was 2 days ago and I'm jonesing for more sex. Then I read a favorite's diary earlier this morning and read that she hasn't been laid in months. I felt badly for her but also extremely lucky to be getting regular nookie. But it's not enough. Oh! I should also mention that I feel exceedingly lucky that, after The Dulcinea and I had our conversation, that she is still wanting me around. Most of you gals said that you couldn't be in a relationship consisting purely of casual sex without emotionally connection. I didn't think she could either but I guess she has found a bit of peace with it. But I know this is all on borrowed time so I must get my arse in gear and seek out a new dulcinea. I think I'll call her my Inamorata. Long hair - I've been getting fired up to be able to run my fingers through a nice, long mane. Seeing these womyn on the street with their hair blowing in the wind - it drives me crazy.

This is how my brain has been lately - wavering between deep, heady thoughts of politics & morals and pure, unadulterated musings of fornication. Quite a contrast.

Oh! Prof. Martin replied that he'd be keen on doing that radio interview so I've gotta apply for a time slot with WORT and do some creative scheduling.

Nigh Is the End

Dinner was tasty last night. I cooked up those jalapeno/bacon brats and picked up some potato salad from the coop. The Dulcinea stopped by in the late evening and we had dinner. She was frisky while I was tired but we headed upstairs to the friendly confines of my room anyway. Post-prandial lethargy abetted by the heat and humidity set in quickly but we managed to get the ball rolling. Once she had given me a stiffy, I asked if she had brought Petunia. She said that it had been under my bed since the weekend. I was blissfully ignorant of this fact. So I asked if she would use it on me and she agreed. (Petunia is a small anal dildo and I must say that it was fun to have a woman use it on me while she also manually pleasured my stiffness.)

After all the naughtiness, she wanted to get serious and find out where she stood and how I felt about our relationship. For her part, she explained how she was totally confused about us and her life generally. For my part, I was honest and said that I like her and care for her but have no intentions of getting into a serious or long-term relationship with her or anyone. What I liked about our relationship as it stood was that it was fun, involved lots of sex, was open & loose, and non-committal. This was exactly what how she thought I felt. To boot, she felt (or at least wanted) our relationship wasn’t as non-committal as I thought it was. In fact, she thought that she was falling in love with me a couple weeks ago but did her best to stop the decent.

The upshot here is that it seems like my summer soiree is close to, if not at, its end. Well, it has been a fun month and a half.

I Need Friday Off

God daily! Jay Farrar is gonna be on Air America and I'm gonna miss it!

Jay will appear on Air America’s “Unfiltered” (www.airamericaradio.com) this Friday, July 23rd from 11:15 am – 11:45 am. He will play “Doesn’t Have to Be This Way” as well as take part in a short interview with Lizz Winstead.

Keep an eye out for an article regarding music and politics in USA Today. It is scheduled to print on the cover of the Life section on Monday, July 26. Jay was interviewed for the story. In addition, Jay was also interviewed for Relix’s Sept/October cover story about music & activism.

Office Droning

This morning has been very slow. Hellaciously so. I’ve been here 45 minutes and taken only one call. Of course, now that I write this, we’ll be inundated but so it goes.

Last night was slothy. I ate dinner and watched Rob Roy. What a fucking great flick! Liam Neeson was good’n’all, but it was Tim Roth and John Hurt who stole the show. Roth as Archibald was classic! He was so weasely and evil and…he does a great Gary Oldman impression. And Hurt as Montrose – the best insults. It was funny how the film seemed to portray Scots as a bunch of honorable and extremely horny people. Rob and Mary were very naughtyAfter that, I set Agent to download some stuff which I cannot remember right now. I know I snagged a slew of e-books and audio books but I can’t recall which ones. Oh! There were a buncha Mark Twain stories involved – I remember that much. We’ll see when I get home. Then Tyrone came over. He borrowed some money from me and wrote some company checks. With monetary matters done, we sat around for a while and chewed the fat.

He first told me that Jim, a business partner of ours, had made some stupid comments after he was told that we’re gonna join MAGNET, an LGBT business networking organization. (Tyrone is gay, you see.) Apparently Jim said crap like, “As long as they know we only fix computers” and “…unless they’re 2 lesbians…”. Um…yeah. The next thing Tyrone tells me is that he’s gonna be an uncle again. Just not via his sister-in-law. His brother has been having an affair with a friend’s wife and now she’s pregnant. The cuckolded hubby is a man of little character as he beats his kids and his wife as well, presumably. Anyway, Tyrone wants to adopt his nephew as his brother is being divorced and the kid will have a complete fuck-up for a father and likely be beaten. Tyrone is as married as gay folks can be in this state to a nice guy named Andy. I was at their “wedding”. Andy works as a teacher/day care person (I dunno these job titles.) Tyrone has a good job. And their hound, Max, is a fun-loving black Lab. So, in many ways, they’re a good fit for adoption. The only problem is the fact that they’re gay and they worry that this will count against them in the application process. I’ve emailed Ronaldo as he kinda sorta works in this area to find out if he knows of any resources or anyone who can offer advice.

After Tryone left, I caught most of a documentary on the Sundance Channel called Detained. The film profiles the lives of 4 Palestinian women living in Hebron on the West Bank. There were some interesting bits such as the extreme ambivalence of these women towards the Jews. In one interview, they’ll say that they don’t hate the Jews and just want everyone to lead good lives. Then, when Israeli soldiers station themselves on the roof of the women’s apartment building and urinate on the roof, leave messes, etc., the interviews turn sour and the womyn curse, not only the soldiers, but Jews generally. Asking God to kill them all and the like. But other parts of the film bog down. The womyn bitch about being widows and then bitch about their husbands. That got old really quickly. Overall, though, it was a good film and I got a glimpse into a world about which I know virtually nothing.

In other news, The Dulcinea wants to do some cooking this week. We’ll see when. I have this weird feeling that I’ve committed myself to doing something with someone tonight but have no idea who or what. Tomorrow we’re gonna see Life of Brian and then I go to The Pollack’s on Thursday to get his new laptop up and running.

I’m getting fairly serious about putting up my own web page. I keep telling myself to do so but I never seem to actually contact a hosting service. And I also keep telling myself to take pictures of stuff to post on this website but I never do. This weekend I hope to find motivation. Get some snaps of the farmer’s market and some from the boat while I’m out on the lakes. Perhaps some of the coffeeshops and various places of interest around town. Anything you regular readers can think of?

Soreness

My arms and thighs are sore. Andy decided to buy a couple jet skis last week and I got to ride one around on Saturday. Life is rough, lemme tell ya. *sarcasm* I never thought it would be such good exercise but you've gotta hang on and use your legs as shock absorbers so you don't plop around. As I was cruising by the student union, the Miami Vice theme song popped into my head.
So I got to spend some time on the lakes this weekend. The Dulcinea came out too and plied her naughtiness. When I was driving, she came to the back of the boat while everyone else was up front or on the jet ski. She'd spread her legs and pull aside her bikini bottom to flash me her naughty bits. Afterwards, we all went to the Naughti-Gal and had dinner. Sunday morning was basically a carnal interlude until Ronaldo called to ask if I had any DVD burning software. I got up and made breakfast for myself while The Dulcinea slept. I'm surprised her muscles didn't atrophy as she laid in bed until after noon. I burned some software for Ronaldo and got my butt in gear.

Breakfast was a sandwich consisting of thick-sliced bacon from a local farm and 10-year aged cheddar on a couple slices of spicy cheese bread from a local bakery. I went to the Farmer's Market on Saturday, you see. I was hoping to meet up with Miss Rosie but never found her. Getting there at 6:30, I got coffee and listened to Catfish Stephenson who was playing on the sidewalk. I bought one of his CDs and chatted with him for a bit. We were joined by a middle-aged woman who loved music as well. She was from out-of-town so we did our best to make her feel welcome. I bought the aforementioned cheese, bread, and bacon as well as a loaf of Tuscan flatbread, lots of jam, and some jalapeno-bacon brats. I am really looking forward to having one of those. Oh, I got some zucchini and yellow squash as well. The jam stand was a hoot. The girl there was all of 18 years old and she fed me samples. I'd never had garlic jam before but, after tasting it, came to the conclusion that it will taste mighty fine on a pork roast or something similar. I made the Yemiser Selatta (Ethiopian lentil salad) and it turned out well. Nothing fancy. The key is to let it sit overnight so that the marriage of the flavors can be consummated. And oh were they ever! The chilies and garlic mixed with the vinegar making it quite delicious.

Marv had to cancel gaming yesterday as it was his sister Bethany's birthday. In lieu of this, I went and bought a couple magazine files and some software. I picked up the Encyclopedia Brittanica on DVD and Baldur's Gate II. BG II is a Dungeons & Dragons game that I've threatened to play but never have. And I just thought it would be cool to have an encyclopedia on my PC. In addition, I seriously perused the Sunday ads as I'm now in the market for a laptop. Of course the one I really want is priced at more than I'm willing to pay. I wanna have one to take around to coffeeshops so I can write but I'd also like to keep it around the house so arguments about stuff can be settled by looking up stuff on the Net. Basically it'll be a handy reference tool. I'll be able to do email, look up recipes while still in the kitchen, etc. And I'll throw some ebooks onto it so it will also be a library, of sorts. Christ am I a dork.
OK. 3.5 hours left of work. Maybe I'll make that cheesecake tonight...

Shutterbug?

Only about an hour and a half left til the weekend! Because I’m feeling frisky, I’ll take you back to Wednesday.

Work was work but The Dulcinea came over Wendesday evening. Since our relationship was built on a strong sexual foundation, we had sex almost immediately. She ended up on top. It went well until my body miscommunicated with itself. Half of my reproductive system thought it had an orgasm while the other half didn’t. And so I got all flaccid without have ejaculated or orgasmed (is that a verb?). We laid there for a short while hugging, kissing, afterglowing – when the conversation took a turn to the naughty and I told her that I wanted to come on her. She agreed as long as none got in her eyes. So I jumped up and kneeled over her. At the end of it all, her eyes were spared.

In return she made me buy dinner for her which ended up being Jamaican. Apparently she’d had a hankering for jerk pork all week. During dinner we watched part of a really horrible movie with Queen Latifah, whom The Dulcinea has a crush on. Then the “Bambi” episode of The Young Ones. Then it was back upstairs where we used my last condom. I was on top this time with The Dulcinea’s legs pointing straight up into the air. She was jealous of my view and whispered that she wants me to photograph my member going inside of her so she can see it too.

Naughty she is.

I only hope that this lasts until September. Just another month and a half is all I ask of the Fates. Then she can drop me like a rock as women always do.

More later including the memorial service – I really need to write about it.

I'm In the Age of the Buggles

OK - I did it. I emailed a philosophy professor down at DePaul University in Chicago by the name of Bill Martin. He's written a book about the music of Yes and another about the history or progressive rock. What I did was to ask him if he'd be keen on doing a radio show with me here. Our local community radio station, WORT, has a program called The Access Hour where anyone in the community can come in and do a show. I'd do one even if Mr. Martin passes on the offer but I think that it would be a hoot!

Pies

It is difficult for me to describe just how thrilled I was to leave work yesterday. Ever have one of those days when it's slow enough to be boring yet busy enough to be distracting? At least I got an invite from the on-site manager of my contracting company to go have cocktails. Apparently they go to a brew pub just a short drive from here every Thursday. Then I later ran into another guy from the group who told me that they go on Mondays as well. Now THAT'S the kind of things I expect from IT work. Most of the people in my department are middle-aged with kids so there's no time for them to go c-tailing after work.

I got home yesterday and installed MapPoint 2004 while I awaited a call from The Caffeinatrix. She eventually did so and we had dinner together at The Harmony. It had been a while since I'd seen her long enough to have a chat of any substance. We shared stories and she gave me lots of shite about dating The Dulcinea. The Caffeinatrix refers to her as "The Wife" and her kids as mine. I tried telling The Caffeinatrix that my relationship with The Dulcinea wasn't a precursor for anything serious. No marriage or kids for me. It was about sex. I also told her that I'm looking for another fraulein - someone to have on the bench, so to speak. But she would have none of it. I was accused of looking for a long-term partner, a serious relationship, etc. Honestly, I'm not. Maybe I'll feel that way in the near future but, for now, I just want the fornication. In fact, I want more.

When I'm driving around, I of course gawk at all the pretty frauleins. I find that I get really turned-on by long hair. It's been that way for a long time but, since The Dulcinea has short hair, I am going even more ga-ga over lengthy manes. Going through campus after work - I'm like a kid in a candy store. All these co-eds in 2-piece bikinis laying out on the lawn of the Kohl Center or hotties out jogging. In my mind, they run in slow motion as I stare at their breasts bouncing up and down. I need to find another divorcee. Preferably a nullipara in her late 20s. And for some reason I've taken on a prediliction for blondes recently. Very odd...

After dinner, it was off to Ronaldo's place to take a peek at his ailing computer. Windoze XP Home has taken a serious digger and he needs to get a file off of the 'puter for work. So I grabbed that in addition to a few books which he gave me. To top things off, he bestowed a 6-pack of various locally-brewed beers and green bud. We stood in the street shooting the shit for a while once everything was in my car. Some honey on a bicycle rode by and he and I both turned our heads staring at her ass. Then a college kid came over to us. He was canvasing the neighborhood trying to solicit donations for the DNC. Ronaldo gave him fitty bucks.

I just got word from Miss Rosie about the results of her biopsy. Thanks the gods! It's not cancer but "scriosis inflamed by stress". I have no clue what scriosis is. Soemthing to do with vaginal dryness and menopause. She bitched about having to lube up for doing the nasty but, hey, better than chemotherapy.

I have a rebate check to cash after work. It's kinda nice - it seems like everyday I have a check to cash. Either for me or for my dad's estate. And Kristina is that strawberry blonde's name. Maybe I'll be able to talk to her again today. Oh! And there's this gorgeous brunette working at Mother Fool's as well. OK. Anyway, the plan is to stop at Toad Hill to pick some cherries after work and after drooling on the hottie teller. Then I'll work on that PC. I have a couple pies to bake as well but would rather do that later this week when it's cooler. Hell, we'll see. Since I don't have to work tomorrow, tonight might be a good night to bake. And now I've told Dogger that I'd burn him a DVD of this Yes concert from 1975 that I downloaded. I went from having a good amount of free time to trying to fit everything in.

It could be worse, I suppose.

Cubicle Land Heats Up

I surfed the Net for a while last night as I was burning CDs and found The Dulcinea online. We traded some emails, most of which were about the fun toys over at A Woman’s Touch. Then she calls and informs me that she is lying on her bed with a dildo inside of her and a vibrator on her panic button. It wasn’t much of a conversation, I can tell you.

I got an email from The Caffeinatrix last night and I responded this morning. She seems to be down in the dumps. I miss spending my mornings with her doing the crossword puzzles, drinking fine coffee, and just chewing the fat. In my response, I told her this and told her that we ought to have dinner together again. If nothing else, we can talk and I can give her a hug. On the bright side, the cherry tree over at Toad Hill has many fruit and I have to go over there to pick some. I have much pie backing to do!

I spent part of last night installing software on my computer. Much to my dismay, Encarta 2K4 Reference Library doesn’t work. At least the Oxford Dictionary does. Ya know, I almost can’t wait for Pete to move out so I can have the basement as my office/study. I can put my OED out on a table, have paperwork spread everywhere and junk lying around. And it’ll be much cooler down there than in my room upstairs. But what will I do with my bedroom? The desk will be gone and so will some of the books. I guess I’ll just have to find something to fill the space. I suppose I can pull the dresser out of the closet. Shit, I’m horrible at interior decorating. I need me a Feng Shui expert here to tell me to point my bed north and my dresser east.

Got another email from The Dulcinea:

”I loved hearing you say "you sound so beautiful" last night. I keep thinking of that...I just want you like crazy. Don't tell me you are the tempted here. YOU are the one that sat next to me and pretended to do the crossword puzzle... Playing hard to get was never a strong suit of mine: when can I see you again? Phone phun is phine, but I need the tactile/olfactory thing too.”

It totally flummoxes me how she could be so enthralled with your humble narrator. I’m just this guy, you know? I’ll just ride the curve and have as much sex and fun as I possibly can. Speaking of which, I get to go to the credit union this afternoon. Hopefully I’ll see Kristy or Kristine or whatever that blonde’s name is. There are absolutely no hotties here in the general area where I sit.

Christ, her emails have made me all frisky. She wrote that she’ll be working late tonight in preparation for an office move but that she’ll be there all alone. So, in theory, I could hoist her sweet ass onto this conference table she keeps telling me about and have sex. Or I could do productive things at home (vs. reproductive). Ronaldo has a PC he needs to have fixed. And I still have oodles of writing to do. She works over here on the west side of town but I live on the far eastern side. Maybe I can convince her to come over tonight for a quickie. She sent me an email last night containing links to pages of A Woman’s Touch’s online catalog – they were for nipples clamps and suction cups. I really would love to try those out on her. Fuck! I’ve gotta find something else to write about because I’m just whipping myself into a frenzy here. I don’t wanna be wandering around the aisles of Cubicle Land with a stiffy…

Curioser and Kinkier

Things just keep getting more interesting. I received a couple interesting emails from The Dulcinea this evening:

"Pron? Were u typing with one hand while manhandling yourself with the other? I've never had phone sex, but I'd like to try it with you. Just typing that turned me on. u and u're demon magik!"

"Do you think you could get an entire hand inside me?"

I was just hoping to have a nice, quiet evening at home and now I'm all frisky.

I got another check today. Well, my father did. Another excuse to go hit on that blonde at the credit union...

Back Hurting

The weekend went pretty well. Except for my back. Somehow I managed to twist it on Friday so I had this pain which persists in my lower back. Since I have 2 computers here at work and I hardly ever sit like a normal person, I think that I was sitting cross-legged and moved so as to be able to type on the other PC when it happened.

Didn't do much Friday night - just relaxed and tried to avoid pain. So I went to bed early and listened to the Doctor Who radio drama "Shada". Got up very early on Saturday morning and drank coffee. Stevie went out on the boat but I wanted to rest my back so I ran errands instead. These included a run to Walgreens to get some naproxen sodium which helped tremendously when I crashed my bicycle several years ago. Also ran and got Marv's brithday gift as well as a trek to the Gateway Mall. There I stopped in at Mad City Music and got Wilco's new album and The Xenon Codex by Hawkwind, an album which I haven't had in my collection for a couple years now. From there, I went to A Woman's Touch and bought some more condoms and a super-sized bottle of lube. As far as the jimmy hats go, I bought a variety pack thinking that a) I’d like to find a brand which allows for more sensitivity and b) there were some funky ones with ribs, swirls, twists, etc. Perhaps The Dulcinea would dig ‘em. I see a lubrication war on the horizon. I’m rather partial to Liquid Silk while Milday has a penchant for Maximus. I find the stuff to be overly viscuous but, hey – different strokes for different folks.

I spent Saturday afternoon cleaning and paying bills. I renewed my subscription to a computer magazine and then paid off what I hope are the last of my dad’s bills to the tune of nearly $1100. I also burned a buncha CDs.
Marv had a friend who was in Thailand and he acquired some pukka apps on the cheap. The discs are making the rounds and it’ my turn now. I got a load of Adobe stuff, including In-Design which will be cool if I ever get off my lazy ass and try to print a zine as I want to do. In addition, there’s the Oxford Dictionary and the new Encarta reference suite. Plus more geeky stuff like .Net Visual Studio. More burning tonight.

The Dulcinea came over Saturday evening. She and I went to the Willy Street Co-op, where I am now a member, and did some grocery shopping. While the bill was about $75, nearly $20 of it was for chocolate, including some highly expensive baking chocolate.

The co-op is a food cooperative in which anyone can shop but members get a discount. It was formed in the mid-70s by a bunch of hippies and features mostly organic foods and “natural” products such as soap, etc. Grains and legumes are sold in bulk for those who worship the nutritive value of the lentil or just need a small amount for that special batch of organic fair-trade whole wheat scones. The food is generally of better quality than typically found at a grocery store and much of it is locally produced.

When we got home, we made a batch of nachos which we shared with Pete and festered. A bit after 9, we headed up to my room and proceeded to have as much sex as we could over the ensuing 15 hours. Unfortunately, The Dulcinea was having trouble reaching orgasm and I felt bad about this. I hated seeing her so frustrated as I had had 2 or 3 of them and, in the spirit of fair play, thought that she deserved one, at the very least. Besides, watching and hearing her in the throes of climax is a tremendous turn-on. Finally, after much sex, cunnilingus, and rubbing my fingers between her legs in a St. Vitus Dance-like fury, she came.

On Sunday, The Dulcinea was preparing to leave but she couldn’t find her keys. So she went up to my bedroom to look for them and I went up to help her. They were just under a pair of my underwear or some such place. We made our farewell embraces and kisses when I found that I couldn’t help myself and pulled down her shorts. This got me hard and I accused her of doing it to me. She firmly denied it so I pulled out the evidence. Next thing I know, both of us are naked from the waist down and she is bent over my bed. I slip on a rubber and enter her from behind. I like this position as I can see a womyn’s ratio, as The Dulicina and I playfully refer to the gentle curves of her hips and ass. After a while, we needed a change of position and she straightened up and turned around. While The Dulcinea repositioned herself, she stepped on something which makes a funny farting sound and then lets a pussy fart fly. (Yeah, I know there’s gotta be a nicer term than “pussy fart” but I’ve been reading Savage Love for too long.) We’re laughing together but I maintain a modicum of composure and lube her naughty bits as well as my trusty Beyond 7 condom. With her legs straight up in the air, I roger her roundly. Her moans and sigh are punctuated with smiles as I was sweating profusely and the droplets would hit her in the face. So she’d try and dodge them by turning her head. Some time later, she needs more lube. I grab the bottle and freshen her up and put on the cock ring she had bought last week. So, we’re all lubed and ready to go when she lets fly another pussy fart. We’re laughing and then the nachos catch up with me and a fart escapes my ass. This sends us both into fits of laughter. So she’s sitting there with her legs spread open while I’m kneeling in front of her with an ever-softening johnson. It was just hilarious. So I collapsed on her and kissed her all over. A fun way to end our weekend together.

The Dulcinea is probably the best partner I’ve ever had. Once we got over the initial bouts of being self-conscious, we both jumped in headlong. Nothing seems taboo – we’re always willing to try new things. A new position is introduced every weekend. And we are very comfortable and very open with one another. We have no problem telling the other where or how we like to be touched, for instance. And she likes me to talk dirty to her in bed, which is a hoot, and to boss her around.

By way of example for all of this, late Sunday morning, after she had her orgasm, I told her to lube me up. She obliged and I began to masturbate. I’ve never felt comfortable masturbating in front of a woman (or a man, for that matter) until The Dulcinea. After I got hard, I ordered her to rub my balls. The look on her face was marvelous. She’ll look at my face and then watch my hand touching myself. She has this look of anxious surprise that is a tremendous turn-on. And she loves to watch me ejaculate. Considering that I’d had 3 or 4 orgasms in a short period of time before this, I had a surprisingly large amount of semen. Then again, I hadn’t masturbated all week. And, having a lot of sex, those muscles down there are getting strong so I am able to shoot what The Dulcinea fondly refers to as my “man juices” with some flare and some distance. I haven’t felt this virile in a while! She even called me her “Sex God”. While no procreative deity am I, it was a nice ego boost. I just put my member in her whenever I get a hardon, that’s all.

After The Dulcinea left, I tried to take a brief nap before heading over to Dogger’s to game. But her scent must have still been on me because I got all frisky and masturbated. I was surprised that I had any semen left in me. Well, enough of the naughty stuff.

Pete and I went over to Dog’s and we gamed. Miss Regan was chillin’ in the basement when we got there. Man, she’s getting big! Anyway, it was an amusing little adventure but I don’t think it went exactly as Marv had planned as we quit early. Seems we did some things that he hadn’t planned on – like actually being able to kill the Drow elf and his umber hulk. OK, we didn’t exactly kill them – it more was more a suicidal kind of thing – but we had them on the ropes. But, upon returning to Everlund, we find out that Drow elves usually have illithids with them so we’ve gotta go back to find it. Severus, my cleric, did some research on them and found out that they such minds out of creatures. I shat bricks. Great, just great. So I’m memorizing every Protection of Evil spell I can find. Anything to keep the illithid from being able to mentally attack me.

What else? My great uncle’s funeral service is Thursday. Gotta call my mom to get a time. And I have to mow the lawn over at Toad Hill. Maybe this evening. Tonight I wanna copy those CDs and return them to Marv. And I wanna read. No self-abuse, though.

Celebration

Well, my cultural activities were curtailed yesterday as I did something to my back. Dunno what - I must have twisted somehow and threw a vertebra out of whack. Walking is a whole lotta no fun right now. When I awoke, I noticed that the answering machine had some new messages so I listened to them. The last one was from my mother and, from her tone of voice, I could tell that things were not well in Chicago.

"I have some sad news for you..."

My great uncle Harry passed away yesterday afternoon. I called my mom back and found that there was still no word on when a memorial service might be held so I await word on that. Just not the way I wanted my weekend to begin. It's such a gorgeous morning - sunny yet temperate. I love mornings like this because the day seems so pregnant with possibility. As if anything could be accomplished and happiness was at my doorstep.

For now, I am going to go to the credit union and deposit my paycheck. Hopefully that strawberry blonde will be working again. I saw her yesterday when was at another branch but wasn't lucky enough to have her as my teller. But, as I walked out the door, I ran into Dogger and Marv who were at the ATM. We ended up going to a gaming shop that opened recently down on Willy Street. I bought a Player's Handbook and, since Marv's birthday was earlier this week, I got him the Monster Manual II, albeit against my better judgement. This means that our party will surely run into even more foul and heinous creatures. The store had a selection of daggers and swords behind glass but there was also a nice little halberd sitting in the corner. It was only $40! I may just have to buy it so I can mount it in my den someday. Or at least in the basement when I move my books and computer down there.

After that, I dunno what to do. Probably do some writing. I am sooo far behind. Maybe I can get Marv over here so he can ply his VBA programming trade. I want to have a database for my bootleg collection. Probably laundry too. My sheets smell like sweat and other bodily fluids.

My father's birthday is in about a month. Still haven't taken any time out alone to look at pictures and such.

I also have some CDs to burn. Some of my musical taste is rubbing off on The Dulcinea, much to my surprise, and she has requested some tunes by various bands. I've burned some Yes and Jethro Tull for her already and Son Volt, Genesis, and Fish are next.

I just feel so sullen. The prospect of having to attend a funeral and deal with grieving family is not fun. This means I'll have to make love with The Dulcinea. And I don't mean this in a sarcastic or silly way. What is more positive, more life-affirming than sex? It's a celebration of life. My father and great uncle are gone but I'm still alive. I ought to celebrate.

Son of a b*&$@!!!

The Indian places don't serve dinner until 5! Back to the drawing board...