03 November, 2005

Yahweh Gives the Thumbs Down

I found the CAP Movie Ministry via Sivacracy. It's a site that rates movies on how offensive they are to those wonderfully pure Christians. Here's the breakdown on the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy:

Wanton Violence/Crime (W)
destruction of the Earth
parasite penetration into a human head
beating, twice
warfare/aggression violence
slapping
attempted execution
gore
abduction by confinement

Impudence/Hate (I)
four uses of the three/four letter word vocabulary

Sexual Immorality (S)
dressing to maximize the human form and/or skin exposure - male
camera angle to force the viewer on private parts
inappropriate touch - a male slapping the posterior of a female
woman in shower
woman in towel only

Drugs/Alcohol (D):
booze, repeatedly
drinking, repeatedly
bar, repeatedly
guzzling
substance intoxication
smoking

Offense to God (O)
tale of man not being the most intelligent life on Earth
claiming man is an ape descendant, repeatedly
belittlement of God, Creation and faith
Darwinism

Murder/Suicide (M)
none noted

Oh, that's just rich. I love the Offense to God section – "claiming man in an ape descendant". That's just too funny. Douglas Adams would no doubt be proud of this review. I wonder if the author has ever bothered to give the Bible the same scrutiny. There's plenty of wanton violence. Brother killing brother, Moses committing genocide – great stuff. Under what category would you put Ezekiel 4:12-13 when the folks eat their own fecal matter in barley cakes?

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