Words. And music.

Throw away the bad news and put it to rest

...

You'll find that it's better at the end of the line

Decorating the refrigerator

Progress may be slow, but the new digs are becoming my own. Today I put my favorite drawing by my youngest stepson on the refrigerator.

 

Happy All Souls' Day

Do you wish people a happy All Souls' Day or is there another, more appropriate greeting? Not being one of the faithful, I have no idea.

Today I am thinking about the departed, especially my brother. Look at his ancient Teddy bear! May you enjoy warm memories of the departed today.

Song of the day, 2 November

Happy All Souls' Day! Today I remember my brother and so here's one of his favorite songs - and mine.

The Fog

It's a foggy autumn morning and a bit spooky outside.

Well, back to the grindstone. SCCM isn't going to upgrade itself.

Coming soon: more apartments (or condos)

Construction has started on the next bit at Hill Farms - some type of housing.

Piper at the gates of dawn

The leaves are dropping fast so I've got to get photos while I can.

Cats and for those times when square ice cubes just don't cut it

A friend gave me this housewarming gift.

It should say "HOME IS WHERE PIPEY IS" but it's still lovely.

Another friend likes to indulge my gaming dorkness and gifted me this fancy ice cube mold that makes rather large d20 drink cooling icosahedron. That smoked rum I bought in Birmingham is gone so it'll likely be rye next time. 

Song of the day, 31 October 2025

I went to the planetarium last night and, since it's Halloween, it just had to be this.

Happy All Hallows' Eve

I am going to enjoy some spooky music today and then head out of town for a concert so I won't be doling out treats tonight. Truth be known, I don't know if I would even get any.

I've decided to observe All Souls' Day and put together a little shrine to honor my brother. Ten years gone but I think about him everyday. He's with me all the time.

Today I am jammin' the Blue Öyster Cult in honor of this horrific day.

Communication

It was a great gift for me that my father-in-law and his wife have maintained our relationship in the face of my divorce. The former invited me out to dinner recently and I chose Vintage Brewing. I could get a good salad there and I was keen to sample Trickory, a hazelnut chicory porter.

It had nice nutty, roasty notes and took on the promised Nutella taste as it warmed. Good stuff.

We chatted away before, over, and after dinner. Our previous conversations have veered from the kids, to my wife, my wife's mother, how to live, et al. Our talk this time began as our chats usually do with a hefty dose about my stepsons. My worries about my youngest filled many a minute as he is really struggling while the oldest is more settled, more independent.

It is incredible to think that my oldest stepson will soon be 30. I can remember the first time I saw the trio that would become my family. It was at a coffeehouse where I was a regular and my wife came in holding each of my stepsons by the hand. The youngest had a look of timid confusion on his face while the oldest was eagerly looking around, perhaps in expectation of a cup of hot cocoa and a sweet treat. For her part, my wife looked stunning with her big brown eyes and a smile that gave her face a warm maternal glow.

So long ago, so much has changed.

When I met my father-in-law and his wife after the divorce got underway, one of the first things I did was to reassure them that my love for my stepsons and the help I could extend to them weren't going anywhere. Since then my father-in-law and I have uttered many words theorizing how to help them, especially the youngest. The will is there but the practical details are in short supply.

I pay his bills, buy him things he needs like a new phone, and try to keep him fed; I hug him when I see him and tell him that I love him. I do what I can and always feel like a failure and that I should be doing more or doing something differently.

Since the divorce began I've learned quite a bit. My father-in-law has been very forthcoming about various things and I've gotten new perspectives on my wife. Last time he told me about her childhood with an emphasis on her mother. This time around he took a different tack and told me about his divorces - why they happened, how they changed him, and how he got through them.

It was really enlightening to hear an older man talk about this subject so forthrightly, to reflect on his life in that way. He talked about the mistakes he made, his wife's foibles, and how he moved on and created a new life for himself, a process that I have just begun. His lessons gave me hope that my next life will be a good one if I reflect upon my mistakes and my wife's and learn to be a better partner.

From our conversations I've learned a lot about my wife, about her childhood, her relationship with her mother, and how these things have influenced her. The tales that my father-in-law has related have helped me understand the decline and fall of my marriage. They've also helped me see my wife as a flawed human being just trying to get through life just like me, just like the rest of us. I understand her not as a solitary figure who causes me great distress and makes me sad, but as part of a larger whole, someone who emerged from a particular family milieu, had her own unique life experiences, and merged her life with mine for a couple decades with all of that in tow. And, when I see her that way, I can feel my anger subside. Perhaps not completely, but to a great degree.

I don't want to live in anger and my conversations with my father-in-law have helped me find direction and ways to think about my situation that I think will help me live a life of joy, one filled with mirth.

Song of the day, 30 October 2025

One of the pleasures of autumn for me is Orion in antelucan sky. It makes me feel as if it is looking down on me, watching over me. It also reminds me of my brother so perhaps he is looking up at me, watching over me like an argus instead of making me into a couch sandwich.

Song of the Day, 29 October 2025

Yesterday there was a problem with a device in Saukville and I sent an email out notifying interested parties. The subject: Don't go back to Saukville.

I don't believe anyone caught my highly creative pun.

One More Red Morning

Compline, 28 October 2025

I've got some Pearl Jam up loud in my headphones and I am petting Piper in between texts to an old friend who knows more about baseball than perhaps is safe. Things just feel good. I was clapping along to the final verse which is some of the most beautiful music ever devised by mankind.

Stoplight plays its part
So, I would say you've got a part
What's your part? Who you are
You are who, who you are

My boss caught me swaying and boppin' to this song in my chair this afternoon. At least she didn't witness me playing air bass. There were ups and downs this day but overall it was good. The past couple days were really wonderful, very fulfilling, and humbling. I met up with a few people I hadn't seen in ages on Sunday and now I've got two lovely ladies looking to take me out plus a gentleman who wants to go out for a beer and discuss music.

Yesterday I had dinner with my father-in-law and was treated to some heartfelt conversation that was also greatly informative.

Lots of thoughts, lots of pieces to fit together.

The new view out front

 

A final(?) trek to the orchard for the season

Over the weekend a friend and I made our third? fourth? trek out to Lapacek's Orchard of the season. It was pumpkin picking time and a coffee cart was there to warm the pickers.

The goats were enjoying breakfast. 

And one of the cats was out soliciting pets.

I bought some Winesaps. What really lured me in was that, when aged, they take on a flavor like marzipan. 

I am not sure what I'll make with them but apple beer cheese soup is definitely in the running.

My friend knows Kim Lapacek and she revealed her latest project: to document baking a different bundt cake every week for a year. The project is to be called Looking For the Bundt Hole.

On the way home my friend and I decided to break our fasts at the Jet Room. I think what sealed the deal was my revelation that I'd never been there.

The novelty is that it's at the airport, the bit where the private planes of the well-heeled land and take off far from the lines of the hoi polloi who wait in line to take their belts off and be scanned. We only saw this lone jet. 

We witnessed a gentleman clad in suit and tie get out of an SUV and enter the plane but I don't recall it taking off. Perhaps this was because I was too busy with my food and the wonderful conversation.

I lost my BattleTech virginity

The battle raged on this past weekend at my friend's house as we played BattleTech for the first time. Well, it was the initial outing for most of us. It was fun.

My friend had a big BattleMech, the Tiger tank of the game, which was armed and armored to the hilt while I had a lighter but more mobile one. He inflicted some severe damage before I was able to leverage my larger movement score while he sat immobile after his BattleMech had overheated and get in his 6 to lay in on him.

Note the hoopy British rubber duck that I got for my friend while in Birmingham.

Theoretically we'll be playing Symbaroum next weekend. I played it for the first time in a short round at Gamehole Con this year and I am keen on playing a longer scenario as I familiarize myself with another system.

A surfeit of pickles

My boss' garden had a bumper+ crop of cucumbers this year and so she turned a significant portion of her harvest into refrigerator pickles - 40+ jars of them. She generously donated 2 of them to me.

They are very tasty, I can tell you. I look forward to layering some on a sandwich made with my my homemade bread.

Are you going to the party?

While in Concord I picked up some Boston Harbor Tea, a (theoretically) fine blend of teas by the same company whose tea was thrown overboard during the Boston Tea Party.

On Sunday a friend is coming over and we're going to have our own tea party. For the occasion she is making browned butter shortbread made from my favorite grain, rye. (She knows me all-too well.) I acquired some plates today so I can stop eating off of my camping plate and will be able to serve her delectables in style.

Chestnuts roasting in an electric oven

'Tis the season for roasting chestnuts and, when I found them at the supermarket, I bought some thinking it would be fun to roast them. I'd never done so before and figured it would be neat to try something new. And so they were roasted today.

First I scored them will very dull knives.

Then they soaked for a spell. 

Next they spent some time in the oven and voila!

Earthy, buttery, and slightly sweet. Delicious. 

A different view

I now get to watch the dawn from my office.

Katzen everywhere

A friend gave me a Japanese chocolate bar with a label that was bursting with cuteness.

Upon opening the wrapper, I found that a kitten trading card was included! 

With a kitten on each side!

If kitten overload wasn't enough, the chocolate itself was tasty. It had bits of something in but I dunno what they were. Puffed rice, maybe?

 

 

My second and third housewarming gifts were these:

 

 

And here is Piper taking a nap. She helps make this place feel something like home.

 

The thighs were grün

A friend treated me to dinner last night at Swagat in Sun Prairie and I ordered something I've never had before: hariyali chicken.

Instead of the brilliant red of tandoori chicken, this stuff was green.

I'm not sure what else was in the marinade besides cilantro - a bit of mint, perhaps - but it was very tasty. Definitely something I'd like to try to cook at home.

Song of the day, 24 October 2025

This song meant a lot to me as the move from Chicago to Wisconsin loomed in my future. Now, in the new apartment, it once again has a special resonance.

When I get up to refill my coffee and see Piper sleeping in her home, feel the warmth of the sun on my skin, this place feels more like home to me.

Roggenbrot, 23 October

I busted out the breadmaker yesterday and tried my hand at making a loaf of rye bread. Well, "making" is a bit of an overstatement since I was, after all, using a breadmaker.

The recipe was from the manual that came with it and called for a ratio of something like 2.5:1 wheat to rye flour. I tweaked it to roughly 1.5:1 and am proud to say that this loaf turned out much better than the last one:

Chewy crust, tender & juicy inside - it was rather tasty. But it still needed more rye taste so I will continue to increase the amount of rye flour in subsequent loaves. I believe using fresh yeast is what made the difference here.

Madison Polish Film Fest '25 Redux

Housewarming

My stepson printed this, a housewarming gift for me.

 

 

While there's a long way to go and a lot of unpacking to do, this helps greatly in making this place feel like home.