The Corona Diaries Vol. 119 - Prelude: Pain

The Tiresias of salt & vinegar potato snacks: Pik-Nik Sea Salt & Vinegar Shoestring Potatoes

My final trek to the supermarket of 2024 produced this candidate for a salt & vinegar review.

These shoestring potatoes were in the snack aisle though I would have expected them to be elsewhere such as in the soup aisle. I mean, Funyuns live with potato chips and Doritos while fried onions should be posted near soups because you need them to top the casserole/hot dish you're making with a base of a creamy condensed soup. Similarly, I primarily think of shoestring potatoes as a crunchy casserole/hot dish topping as opposed to a standalone snack.

But I am wrong. Fried onions are in the canned vegetable aisle. Well, onions are a vegetable and fried ones do come in a can. Still, I'd expect shoestring potatoes to be right next to those onions just waiting for a chance to crown a casserole/hot dish.

See! These things are throwing my whole snack taxonomy off.

Furthermore, they blur the distinction I've been making in my reviews between potato chips and all other salt & vinegar foods. These are cut potatoes and not formed & shaped potato mush things. It's just that they're roughly the size of matchsticks and not chips that result from slicing. Do I give them the "full" treatment or relegate them to an addendum?

As best I can find, the term "shoestring potato" dates back to 1906 when it appeared in a novel called You Should Worry Says John Henry by George V. Hobart. The line reads "The next course was French fried potatoes with some shoestring potatoes on the side, and I began to get nervous."

I was surprised to find that the Pik-Nik Foods company seems to make shoestring potatoes and nothing else. That's quite a niche market but they seem to be doing fine.

Now, onto their Sea Salt & Vinegar flavor.

These bits of spud were a nice yellow color and golden brown at their tips. They smelled strongly of oil with some potato.

They had a really nice potato taste that came across as being more earthy than sweet. I didn't taste what I think of as a heightened level of saltiness while the vinegar was medium. I've definitely had salt & vinegar snacks with less vinegar tang and my tongue was able to successfully resist going numb from Pik-Nik's acetic acid assault.

All in all, these were very tasty, even if not as potent in the vinegar department as I'd like. I ate mine straight but would like to investigate their casserole/hot dish topping potential.

You got ginger in my lemongrass! You got lemongrass in my ginger!

Next in my drink-thru of the NessAlla menu is a kombucha that has a Southeast Asian tinge to it: Lemongrass Ginger. As someone with a severe addiction to tom yum soup, I wondered how it was that I didn't taste this one first.

The tea was a hazy yellow and the first thing I smelled was that acetic acid tang. There was also sweetness and a lovely citrus-floral mix of lemongrass and ginger.

I think this stuff had a heavier mouthfeel than its appearance betrayed and this mismatch did something to the kombucha tasting part of my brain which made the sweetness came across as being stronger than it likely was in reality. It just had a sweet tea thing going on for me with some tang and that wonderful lemongrass-ginger duo tasting good. These flavors just complement one another so well. They both have citrus and floral elements but the lemongrass leans floral while ginger adds a pepper-like spiciness.

I expected it to be drier on the finish but my tongue never got that wave of tannins and, instead, got a low dose.

This stuff is tasty, though I'd prefer a bit less sugar. By no means as cloying as the drink of the South, it leans in that direction, though only just. The lemongrass and ginger were delicious but overshadowed, at times, by the sweetness.

An unruly and unforgettable sonic explosion

I discovered Avalanche Kaito just a few days ago and am just a hair's breadth from buying their latest album. From their Bandcamp page:

A Burkinabe urban griot (vocalist and multi-instrumentalist Kaito Winse) meets a Brussels noise post-punk duo (Drummer/dataist Benjamin Chaval and guitarist Nico Gitto). It's a completely new alloy and a huge opportunity to deconstruct both traditional and futurist knowledge. An unruly and unforgettable sonic explosion created by the intersection of wayward travellers.

Happy New Year

Happy New Year to all who use the Gregorian calendar!

I went out for a walk at Acewood Park on this grey, dreary start to 2025. A few flakes were coming down but only a few. We need snow!

It was rather quiet except for the din of Highway 51. I saw only a single squirrel and a handful of birds. With no open water, the mallards and geese were off gallivanting elsewhere.

Coming soon, 31 December

I saw Babygirl today at our local AMC outpost and was graced with 9 trailers. 9!! Death of a Unicorn looks to be fun. Lots of Soderbergh in 2025.

Oh look, the human has returned

Things that are confusing

I thought this kind of thing was illegal.

With no caffeine, how does it awaken you?

Coming Soon, 22 December 2024 Edition

I went to see The Lord of the Rings: The War of the Rohirrim last week at Marcus Palace and here were the trailers.

One man's Baltic Porter is another man's Imperial Russian Stout: Baltic Porter by Dovetail Brewery

When I think of Baltic Porter, I think of crusty, disheveled 17th century fellows sitting at a tavern in Gdańsk on the shores of the Baltic Sea reminiscing about the good ol' days of the Hanseatic League and bitterly lament how the Atlantic trade with its cheap goods from America has just ruined everything. Over flagons of this hearty brew, they revel in the glory days when Finns traded saunas for Latvian pickled herring, the Germans traded their artisanal salt to the Swedes for potash in order to make industrial strength beer glasses, and the Poles offered honey and rye in exchange for silk for all the lovely Polish ladies to wear.

Also when I think of Baltic Porter, I think of a pitch black brew that looks like motor oil when poured into a glass. And it has a viscous feel to it when drank. A nice, full body. (Hint hint. Nudge nudge. Say no more! Say no more!) You know, Baltika #6 and the stuff from Żywiec. But when your Baltic Porter is just a hair from 10% A.B.V. like Żywiec's or Third Space, maybe it's become a Russian Imperial Stout. Baltika #6, on the other hand is only 7%. Looking at other Polish porters - Baltic Porter is a Polish invention, as I understand it - I see 7-8%.

I was thrilled to be able to find some Baltic-style porter from Dovetail on a recent trek to Chicagoland as I just don't recall seeing any here in Madison. It is my impression that it's their late fall specialty, something to enjoy with the cooler autumn temperatures now that you've drunk all of your Festbier and are impatiently waiting on Jenny Pfäfflin to get that Holiday Bock out of the lagering tanks.

The label said it was 6.6% A.B.V. which was less potent than the Okacim Porter which lines Polish store shelves throughout Chicago while being significantly easier going than Żywiec Porter which is 9.5%.

Whatever strength a Baltic Porter may be, it will always be like a black hole in your glass. If you had giant glass vat of the stuff, you could stand behind it and no one would be able to see you. A fine beery hiding spot. My pour produced a lovely, but fast-fading, dollop of tan foam atop the Stygian suds. In addition to looking like its brethren, it smelled just as expected too with coffee and dark chocolate at the fore with a honeyed sweetness and something green bringing up the rear.

The medium-heavy body tasted somewhat restrained and did not simply make my tongue feel as if I had accidentally sipped from a quart of Valvoline. A firm fizziness probably helped. I tasted coffee, dark chocolate, raisin, and a little caramel while a herbal hoppiness proved to be just the right amount to balance those malty flavors. The coffee, chocolate, and mild sweetness lingered on the finish until the hops mustered just enough gumption for a bit of dryness here and a smidge of bitterness there.

Dovetail did a very, very nice job here as this is great stuff. The coffee and chocolate flavors were positively delicious and they didn't have that ostentatious look-at-all-the-black-malt-we-used-here bitterness. And it was hopped perfectly. Enough counterpoint to the roasty flavors but without trying to steal the show. I loved how it was as full-flavored as any counterpart yet, unlike some, one of these just isn't enough to last you throughout Advent.

Junk food pairing: Grab a bag of Utz's Pumpernickel Pretzel sticks and a big jar of spicy mustard for dipping to go with Dovetail's finest.

Scenes from a snowfall, December 2024

We got several inches of snow a few days back. The storm started during the day and continued until the following morning.

Luckily I did not have to go into the office and could enjoy the lovely scenes. (And keep up with the shoveling.) The critters were huddled around the bird feeder waiting on seed to come tumbling down courtesy of the messy house sparrows.

I did go out that night, however, and the roads were treacherous.

The storm had passed by the time I awoke the next morning. After a few gulps of coffee, I went out for a walk around the neighborhood.

A flock of mallards did not seem bothered by the chilly waters of Starkweather Creek.

The sun cast some fine shadows.

I was happy that we would have a white Winter Solstice.

Report from Beantown: Utz Salt 'n Vinegar

It feels like Utz's potato chips started showing up on Madison store shelves only fairly recently and in only limited flavors, one of those not being salt & vinegar. Very disappointing.

A couple two tree weeks ago I was in Boston and stopped in at a supermarket near my hotel, a Star Market, to get a dose of New England culinary culture. While I now see that the chain originated in the Boston area, they carried precious little that Massachusites, or Massholes, as I was later informed that denizens of The Bay State were to be called, produced. Perhaps I just didn't look in the correct aisles. Or Massachusites are too busy doing patriciany things to be bothered with slicing and frying potato chips.

What I did find, however, was the elusive Utz Salt 'n Vinegar chip. Utz is headquartered in southeast Pennsylvania so I guess it qualifies as a regional delicacy. I had an impromptu tasting in my hotel room.

Sticking my nose in the bag and taking a whiff, I was delighted to smell the aroma of fresh oil, some potato sweetness, and a not insignificant dose of vinegar tang. I poured some chips out on a plate and found them to be very thinly sliced and have that typical light yellow color with splotches of brown.

They had a nice crisp snap to them and a fine slightly sweet, earthy potato taste. The oil was not too strong and the vinegar flavor was firm. Better than firm. These were downright tangy! Very nice! They were fairly salty as well. Just a notch or two down from the Platonic idea of salt & vinegar chips that is Vitner's.

The funny thing is that there is no vinegar on these chips; no acetic acid. We've got the lactic, malic, citric, and fumaric types, though. But they do the trick and give your tongue a dose of zesty tang that approaches, but doesn't quite attain, the lethal.

I also see here the Vitner's is now part of the Utz megacorp. Maybe the chip architects for the different brands have no contact with one another. I also see that Utz has a pumpernickel pretzel which makes me sad because Snyder's of Hanover seems to have forsaken this wonderful flavor years ago and I have never seen Utz pretzels in Madison of any stripe.

Let us hope that Utz exports this flavor to Madison soon.

Like the nectars of old: Mango Turmeric by NessAlla Kombucha

Next up in my journey through the drinks of Madison's NessAlla kombuchary (kombuchery?) is their Mango Turmeric.

The stuff was rather hazy and this dulled its light golden hue. It smelled like kombucha - that tangy herbal aroma along with - quelle surprise - mango. There was also some pineapple in there.

It tasted rather thick and heavy - like those Libby nectars that I drank as a kid. However, there was a nice bite to it which I suspect was part fizz, part vinegar. Again, mango and pineapple were prominent with orange and ginger less so. All of the fruitiness obscured most of the tea flavor though the tropical medley wasn't the worst flavor ever. As it warmed some tannins came through, especially on the finish.

Not bad but definitely heavy on the fruit. A busy formula that made me wish there was more tea flavor. For such a viscous feel on my tongue, it is rather low in sugars/carbohydrates.

Rye lager? Make it so.: Rye Lager by Phase Three Brewing Co.

Years ago my annual trek to Chicago TARDIS down in lovely Lombard, Illinois meant a visit at Binny's where I'd eagerly snatch up some Hoss, a rye Märzeny kind of brew from Denver's Great Divide. At some point, that beer, quite unsurprisingly, stopped gracing Binny's shelves in the fall when I was there. This made me sad because this autumnal pilgrimage had become a tradition and Hoss was (is?) a great beer. Oh well. All good things and whatnot. As time wore on, I became inured to being rye lager-less as the winter solstice approached.

Until this year.

Chicagoland has many a brewery which can make perusing the local beer shelves at Binny's something of a chore because a lot of breweries means a lot of IPAs. As in a number that feels like it approaches infinity. There's a mesmerizing quality to scanning the shelves as the letters fly by...I-P-A. Soon every beer looks to be an IPA. And so it was last month. Until I ran across Phase Three's Rye Lager. Could it really be? The IPAs beneath and above and to either side beckoned me.

"Come taste of our faux tropical fruit..."

I felt like Captain Picard in that Star Trek: The Next Generation episode where he's being tortured.

"There are four-packs of rye lager!" I roared back in defiance of the Citra siren calls.

Shaking off my hypnotic haze, I found that indeed there were four-packs of rye lager staring back at me from the shelf. I already had two Rauchbiers, a Dovetail flavor I'd never had, plus multiple brews from abroad. Did I really need more beer?

Yes!

Phase Three is a brewery in Lake Zurich, Illinois, a northwestern suburb of Chicago. I have no doubt seen their brews before but don't recall ever having tasted any of them. Without meaning to sound overly cynical, I admit to tempering my expectations. There were a lot of Phase Three IPAs on the shelf too so could they pull off a decent lager?

Luck was on my side and I managed to capture one of my pours where there is some head. My glass was happy to have a lot of the light tan foam and, thankfully, it stuck around a while. The brew was a lovely clear amber and I saw a fair number of bubbles inside. No haze; a good start. My luck continued as I took a whiff and smelled grains: a bit of bread, at first, and then some earthy rye. A berry-like fruitiness followed as did some herbal hoppiness.

A medium-light body held a firm fizziness. My initial sips were malt madness with bready and doughy flavors complemented by that earthy-spicy rye goodness. The hops stayed below the fray but I could taste their herbal tentacles weaving themselves between and among all those malt flavors. The rye and a touch of malty sweetness lingered on the finish but eventually ceded to the hops which took on a deliciously spicy aspect. Fizz and hops united for a mellow dryness accompanied by a gentle bitter bite .

What a wonderful surprise. I had my doubts about what appeared to be another IPA factory dipping its toes into the lager waters but Phase Three meant business. For me, this was an easy drinker despite being 6.6% A.B.V. and I had a hard time sitting there with a rye lager in front of me and not pouring it down my maw. The rye flavor was great and benefited from the beer not being particularly sweet. Plus the hops complemented the malt flavors perfectly and I appreciated how they orchestrated a refreshingly zesty finish.

I hope Phase Three brews this again next year so that rye lager returns as an autumn tradition.

Junk food pairing: Pair P3's Rye Lager with a big bag of Mike's Hot Honey potato chips from Utz. (Utz's Mike's Hot Honey potato chips?) The mild sweetness from the honey and potatoes will complement the rye perfectly. These chips don't burn like the fires of Hell but that little bit of heat goes well with the hops and really accentuates their peppery taste on the finish.

How do you say "bummer" in Polish?

I had a Polish bock beer and was all excited to find succor in it after wandering in the cold and write a review of it as a companion piece to the one of Giant Jones' version and then I find that the beer was bad. Long past its life expectancy with that worty-vermouthy taste. Bummer.

But I remain undeterred. As Douglas MacArthur once said, I shall return with a fresh bottle...

Describe in single words only the good things that come into your mind about Rauchbier: Smoked Helles by Pipeworks Brewing

Rauchbier? Let me tell you about Rauchbier.

Christmas came early at Binny's last month as I walked out into the chilly Downers Grove air with not one but two Rauchbiers. (And a rye lager. And a couple intriguing Polish brews.) I felt what I imagine a new father feels like after his first child is born - all giddy and elated. But, instead of the pride of having sired offspring, I felt the satisfaction that I would be able to enjoy the autumn nights with a luscious, smoky companion.

Sadly, the first Rauchbier that I tasted from my stash was a disappointment - just too much fizz. So I looked to Pipeworks to rectify the situation. Their Oaked Smoked Helles Lager had proven to be excellent and I felt that the (presumably) beech wood version would be as well.

It's funny to me how my perception of Pipeworks has changed over the years. When I first became aware of them I sought out their fruited Berliner Weisses. And then they seemed to go all unicorn IPA on me. I was once at a party with a bunch of brewers from a local brewery - the grunt type of brewer, not the brewmasters who get all the glory - who were a fair bit younger than me. Pipeworks came up and they all bent over backwards to praise, if not worship, their unicorn IPAs. It was as if the hops used in their beers were unique to the brewery and no other had the Precious. I couldn't help but think "What the hell is wrong with kids these days?"

But now Pipeworks has this Pastrami on Rye beer that is infused with rye goodness and seasoned with spices not normally found in beer. It's like a gruit and a Jewish deli made the beast with two backs and had a delectably toothsome child. Then this fall I discovered that they have not one but two different Rauchbiers, each brewed with a malt that was smoked with different variety of wood. Pipeworks deserves tons of credit for escaping the gimmick trap that holds many a craft brewery tied to a routine of brewing barely distinguishable IPAs. I no longer think of unicorns when I think of Pipeworks which is a testament to their willingness to brew with ingredients I prefer over fruity hops and their ability to make quality beers.

For once my photograph is more or less in focus and does a decent job of portraying the foam situation as my pour produced a smallish head that was just off-white. These bubbles were positively kinetic like soda and they burst fairly quickly. On the other hand, my camera's rather poor white balancing makes the beer look a deeper gold than it truly was. The brew was clear and I spied a goodly number of bubbles inside. As expected, a smoky aroma wafted up from my glass and set the olfactory part of my brain all aglow. After it had settled down, I caught a hint of bread as well as some grassy hop scents.

A medium-light body was adorned with a firm, but not overwhelming, fizziness.

Whew!

I mean, was there ever any doubt?

Upon my first sip, waves of ambrosial smokiness caressed my tongue. They weren't tsunamis nor were they mild spilling waves. They hit that nice Goldilocks mid-point. (Though, truth be told, I wouldn't have minded if it had been even smokier.) A bit of bread joined the fray along with grassy hops. On the finish, all the malty goodness slowly faded - smoke tends to leave my palette more slowly than sweetness - letting the hops come to the fore with a more spicy flavor. This, along with the fizz, made for a moderate dryness with slightly less bitterness.

Pipeworks really came through here. Although less bready/Maillardy than Schlenkerla's Helles, this and its oaken sister are excellent Rauchbiers. Luscious smoke and the fizz/hop combo provide balance and a nice, dry finish. Fine brews indeed.

Junk food pairing: As with the oaked smoked stuff, this smoked Helles pairs well with potato chips, especially the All Dressed or Cheese & Onion varieties.

Feeling the cold of winter

We got several inches of snow a couple days ago and this song has been in regular rotation for me. (Do any other Genesis fans avoid the 2007 remix with the Lars Ulrich drum sound?)

Happy Rush Day!

A friend just wished me a Happy Rush Day. It took me a minute but then realized today is 21/12.

Here's a bit of 2112 from Milwaukee in 2013, a show I was at.

Happy Solstice!

We are here:

Happy Winter Solstice!

I held the beer so tightly in my hands: Rauchbier by Goldfinger Brewing Co. & Maplewood Brewery

"Is that the brewery that makes Pulaski Pils?" I asked myself when seeing "Maplewood Brewery and Distillery" on a can of this beer. Truth be known I've never had Pulaski Pils but I am surprised at this considering I grew up in Chicago a block from Pulaski Road and had a Polish grandmother. Casimir Pulaski Day meant a day off from school and time to go cause low level mayhem in the alleys. Driving into Lincolnwood always prompts a bit of derision towards the northern burb. I mean, Crawford Avenue?

While Maplewood distributes here in Madison, I've never had any of their brews. And so their logo prompted a bit of interest but no trepidation due to a beer of theirs that I didn't take to. Let's taste what you've got. Unlike Maplewood, Goldfinger does not distribute here in Madison but I have been to their taproom. The beers I had there were excellent. I think they do decoction mashes and they proudly advertise that their beers are lagered in horizontal lagering tanks, though I don't know what the orientation of the tanks does to the beer. Whatever brewing voodoo they do, I am all for it as the beers of theirs I have known and poured into my maw were overflowing with Maillard goodness. And they came in mugs with a generous head, as is proper, letting my nose have a thrill instead of being all sullen and jealous of my tongue.

Even if I was unfamiliar with Goldfinger and had, perhaps, a less than stellar experience with a Maplewood beer, I still would have bought their Rauchbier collaboration because Rauchbier is just like manna from heaven and hope springs eternal. I don't recall the can indicating what style it was, a smoked Märzen, for example. Nor do I remember if the can indicated what time of wood was used to the smoke the malt. I always presume it's beech wood unless told otherwise.

My cans indicated they were filled on 24 October and I bought them Thanksgiving weekend.

My pour would have made the barkeeps at Goldfinger proud as my glass was topped with a few fingers of off-white foam. (Pre-photo, that is.) It was loose and frothy and lasted what I think of as an average amount of time. The brew was copper colored and clear with a goodly number of bubbles to be seen inside. A sweetly scented smokiness hit my nose first followed by dash of cherry and a faint bit of grassy hops. Ooh la la!

A medium-light body held a lovely smoke taste which was accompanied by a slight malty sweetness. The hops took on spicy notes in addition to the more green ones from the aroma. And there was lots of fizz which cast an astringent shadow over the beer. For the finish, the fizz ganged up with the hops and washed away the maltiness leaving a really nice dryness with the perfect level of bitterness.

I suspect that the more than generous amount of carbonic acid here dulled my tongue because it became progressively harder to taste the malt and hops - a bit like when you overindulge in some potent salt & vinegar potato chips. They were basically smothered by all that fizz. This was a liquid palimpsest with the carbonation at the fore but the Rauchbier still barely visible beneath. And so, while the first few gulps were very tasty, the smoky satisfaction dissipated all too quickly.

Bummer.

Junk food pairing: I paired by Rauchbier with a bag of Herr's Jalapeno Poppers Flavored Cheese Curls. They have a rich cheesy flavor and just enough heat to make you feel it. Plus the jalapeno complements the smokiness well.