Fearful Symmetries

Witness a machine turn coffee into pointless ramblings...

18 February, 2004

The Camera Eye

these seconds, minutes when my courage was facing an extremely beautiful woman, a stranger, knew no limits, were later a mystery to me but far greater mysteries were to come I naturally had no idea at the time the only thing on my mind as the train reached the station was whether she would get off the train here to my relief she remained sitting even when the train came to a halt she remained focused on her book and its secret taxt that was flowing into her mind what was it she was reading? much to my astonisment I noticed that she had put a hand on her thigh, right above her knee, but she did not let it rest there it pressed her dress against her skin and slowly, exceedingly slowly, moved upwards, pulling her dress along as it moved, to reveal more and more of her thigh I could not help looking it felt as if my body were levitating, weightlessly from the clammy seat, rose and became one with the Pslams of David now I could not must not look any longer I squeezed my eyes shut and whispered internally Sin, this is Sin which clothed our Redeemer's head with thorms and pierced His heart, which put Him through suffering, sorrow, pain and anguish

her breath

her lips, the invisible droplets

then she asked if I had a pen she could use

I produced a pen from my breast pocket and handed it to her

then she leafed through her book, to the last, blank page, and started drawing she drew quickly and precisely what could it be? circles and lines, it looked like geometric figures, complicated patterns the terrain outside the compartment window glided past but I paid no attention to the changing scenery I tried to follow the lines, her movements, her slender fingers, no rings, discreet nail polish she was drawing meticulously and determinedly while lifting her eyes from time to time to look at me, making sure I was paying attention to her this interaction, I felt certain, must lead to something or other

she was done

she nodded, apparently satisfied

then she carefully tore the page from the book and handed it to me &I took it and thanked her, but for what? I naturally did not know at the time that I should not only have thanked her but I ought to have sunk to my knees and kissed the floor beneath her shoes the drawing I held in my hand, of which I understood absolutely nothing, despite having examined it closely, was destined to, over the following days and months, precipitate a revolution in my soul I remained sitting with the piece of paper in my hand until the train, quite unexpectedly, stopped at a tiny, nameless spot outside Santiago then, hastily, the girl got up

"if you decipher this drawing, you shall learn what truly is concealed in heaven" she said

then she smiled an impish goodbye and stepped off the train the platform was on the opposite side of the compartment so I didn't have a chance to wave before the train forged ahead
|| Palmer, 10:43 AM


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